As I write this, it’s mid-March and I’m recovering from the loss of Grandma and all that her death entailed during that chapter of our journey.
I’m also looking back on some goals that I’d made late last year and earlier in 2019. Some don’t apply any longer. Some got turned upside down and wiped out because I either hit them already or I’m no longer interested.
(Turns out, living in a state of constant motion and caretaking of another human lends itself to some strange and often unrealistic ideas. Caretaker syndrome, I think they call it. I did resist the urge to run away from home, get a tattoo of a prancing unicorn on my forehead and quit my productive day job in lieu of working for a traveling circus. I’ll take the wins where I can get them. I did, however, manage to sign up to help butcher chickens later this summer because it sounded like a good idea at the time. So…, yeah.)
At any rate, I’m preparing for a time of rejuvenation and reset. A time to focus in some peace and quiet and without the Oh-Look problem. “Oh, look. The laundry needs switched.” “Oh, look. That window needs new curtains.” “Oh, look. That cat needs pets.”
Or, my favorite writing/goal-setting procrastination line: “Oh, look. I should sit down and write five more blog posts.”
So I’m doing a few posts ahead to be clear of the excuse to do them while I’m away.
I’m dangerously close to finishing my first novel. I say dangerously, because finishing is terrifying. What next?
This novel has been an Oh-Look problem as well. Want to write something new? Try out a different style? “Oh, look. That story needs piddled with.” “Oh, look. This chapter has to be redone.” “Oh, look. Let’s change the point-of-view character.”
When something major has been hanging over your head for so long and then it’s not any more, there’s a hollow that must be filled with something. Because no hollow stays hollow. Something will crawl in there accidentally if said hollow isn’t filled on purpose.
And I don’t want to “accidentally” end up with a project that isn’t fun or worthwhile.
The same could be said of relationships, but I’ll not dive into that analogy.
Time to figure it out. What major story do I want to dance with next? What other projects?
I signed up for an anthology project for later in the fall. That will be fun, but there are some things I need to do and learn and get out of the way before that writing begins in earnest—I know it will stretch me and kill brain cells at the same time.
So, short and sweet while I reset the gears. Turn the page. Explore the new chapter.