I was excited to write this week’s blog. Snarky, funny, light.
But that was before.
Today, the calendar said I would be four counties away, traipsing through a corn maze with a crazy group of kiddos and good friends. A fun fall activity even though it’s 98 degrees outside.
That was before.
Instead, today, I’m off to buy Minnie Mouse stickers — Mickey if I can find him. This seems like the next logical step while we figure out the next step.
So many steps...
Breathe in. Blink. Exhale.
Trudi, my concrete lawn goose in charge of marketing, is by my side. Somber.
Trudi was my mother-in-law’s goose first. She guarded the door to the little apartment donned year-round in her red velvet Christmas cape and bonnet. Instead of sending Trudi away with strangers when Mom-in-Law moved to assisted living, I adopted the goose and hired her as office staff.
Mom-in-Law got a kick out of that.
I sit here and try to write. Clear the soul and mind a bit, then try again on that snarky, funny, light piece. I can’t tap into that energy right now.
Mom-in-Law passed away this morning. All I can do now is hold space for sorrow and honor her memory.
And buy Minnie Mouse stickers. I’ve no clue what I’m gonna do with them once I find them, but it’s an urge I can act on.
Like adopting the goose. Go figure.
My mother-in-law was snarky and funny once you got her going. A piece of strawberry pie usually opened up the happy vibes, and she’d tell stories and lay down some of the best one-liners. She adored westerns, Home Alone, and Disney mice. She had a knee-high pair of those mousey lovebirds in her living room at one point.
Crazy about those mice. Oh, the things that stick in your brain during times like these…
I heard a new-to-me story this week. Her car broke down on her way home from work. She decided she had two options: steal a horse from a nearby field and ride it back to town or stop traffic and hitchhike back home.
Thankfully for the horse, she stopped traffic.
Unfortunately for the driver, it was more of a car-jacking than a hitchhiking.
Her favorite activity of late was discovered by accident.
She’d call the Hubs and ask him to bring her another bag of candy. Reese’s Cups. Cookies and Cream Hershey bars. Zeros. Three Musketeers.
He’d oblige, usually in quantities enough to keep her sweet tooth satisfied for a week or more. But within a day or two, he’d be informed she was out. We were concerned about getting a call she’s in a diabetic coma.
We couldn’t figure out how she was going through so much candy so quicky.
And when he took her out to various restaurants on Friday nights, she’d also want to run by the doughnut shop. Or Taco Bell.
Really? But you oblige. Especially when it’s your momma who reminds you she can beat you with her walker.
Then we found out.
She’d load her walker seat up with goodies and travel the hallways at the facility, passing out candy and, evidently, tacos to the staff and residents.
(My apologies to the families of patients who had blood sugar or cholesterol spikes in the time Mom-in-Law was their neighbor…)
After every visit with her, she’d say, “Hey, Beth? Take it easy.”
We sit next to Trudi and remember. Even Little Miss Muse and the felines, Zeppo and the Jiggle Dragons are still. We honor and let grief do its thing.
In the coming days and weeks, plans will fall or flop or flail into place as they always do during these times. Memories shared. Belongings sorted. Tears shed.
In the coming days and weeks, the world won’t stop spinning. Laundry. Groceries. Car maintenance.
In the coming days and weeks, the words will come back online. The snark, the light, and the funny mingled with a bit of sad.
But today? Minnie Mouse — Mickey if I can find him.
***
Hey, Kathy? Take it easy.
